Since dating can take up as much time and effort as a part-time job you don’t even get paid for, we don’t exactly hate “dating choreographers,” but they really should try a little bit harder to hide their too-perfect game. A dating choreographer is someone who makes you feel like your dates are all *just for you* when really, they plan the same charming sh*t for everyone they go out with. From the stories they tell to the walk they take you on after dinner, they have this down to a science, so it can be hard to spot the signs of a dating choreographer…because that’s the whole point — it also feels authentic.
Dating someone like this isn’t necessarily the worst thing in the world. At least you’re getting some action, and at least it’s well-thought out action. Much like dating a player, it can make you feel pretty cheap when you pick up on the fact that they’ve done all of this before. While a player will seem non-committal the whole time, a dating choreographer might have you convinced that you’ve found someone serious, but you almost definitely haven’t. They’re just that good at what they do.
It’s a mind f*ck: Even if they really do like you, and you like them back, the fact that they’ve used the same lines and booked the same hard-to-get tables for likely dozens of other people can really ruin the mood.
Here’s how to spot the dating choreographer before you get hurt.
They call the shots.
It’s nice when someone sort of takes the lead when it comes to making plans, especially if you’re the kind of person who gets hives while picking out the “perfect” place for drinks. The dating choreographer will prey on the indecisive. Instead of taking turns suggesting things to do, this person always takes charge and wants to do things their way.